加藤ミリヤ - 20-CRY- (Lyrics)

加藤ミリヤ - 20-CRY-
作詩：Miliyah  作曲：Miliyah


人混みの中ひとりきり「寂しい」と呟く
誰も気付かない　誰も気にしない　誰もいない
私はひとり　いつもひとり　ずっとひとりで
歩いて行くのかな　とても苦しいのに


どうして私はここにいるの　baby
どうして私は生きているの…ツライ


※ねぇ　誰か助けて
ねぇ　どうしたらいいの
もうわからないよ私が生まれたその意味を
ねぇ　私に気付いて
ねぇ　この世界で一人だけでいい
ただあなただけ


期待はずれの人生　理想とはほど遠い
私の行く道　その行方未知　ひとり歩けない
大人になったの　怖くなるの　泣きたくもなるよ
すべてわかってるの　だからこんなにも虚しいのだけど


会いたい人にはきっと会えない　ひとつになれない
この思いもあなたに届かない　ああ


Repeat ※


この悲しいMy life
何求め　何期待したらいいの
私はここだよ
ひとり　CRY
なぜ悲しみがあるの
なぜ喜びを求めるの
なぜ不安になるの
ねぇなぜ生きてるの


人は一人きりでは生きてはいけないんだ
だから私をお願いだからひとりにしないで
ねぇどうか私を必要としてよ　私を愛してよ
この涙が乾くころにはきっと朝がまたくるから
私は生きてるよ
生きてるよ…


I never paid attention to this song. The melody was pretty, the MV was pretty, but nothing really stood out so I never watched/listened properly. But then by chance I watched the MV with subtitles of the translation and it really moved me. It was so powerful and overflowing with emotion, of pain, loneliness, helplessness, hopelessness. Her vocals were great and bought out the meaning to the extent that almost broke my heart. When she sang "私はここだよ ひとり CRY" it was so powerful yet delicate that it brought shivers down my back. Miliyah has once again proved it impossible for me (or anyone) not to love her.

 誰も気付かない　誰も気にしない　誰もいない

From these lyrics I can picture it in my mind, she is standing in the middle of a busy street, the rain is pouring down, there are lots of people but they are just shadows passing by, no one notices her even though she is screaming at the top of her lungs, 私はここだよ!! This kind of loneliness and helplessness, I am sure
a lot of people can relate to, at least to me anyway.

期待はずれの人生　理想とはほど遠い

The name of the song is 20-CRY- so I assume it is Miliyah's take on what it feels like being 20 years old. 20 is a delicate age, you are legally an adult, but you don't feel like one, you are not a child anymore yet you are not an adult. You expected a lot more when you were younger but when you get there the reality is far from what you expected. You are not prepared and you are scared, of the expectations from others, the responsibilities placed upon you, the uncertainties of the future. You feel helpless and you start to question the meaning of your existence.  But you have to keep walking (because society requires you to) but you can't see what's ahead or if there is anything ahead for you. Disappointment, fear, helplessness, pain.

もうわからないよ私が生まれたその意味を


Despite all that, it is still okay if you have found love. But if you haven't, then you really would doubt why you are here in this world. This song speaks out for those who have never loved, or have loved but never been loved back, for those who are still searching for the one.

この世界で一人だけでいい  ただあなただけ


It's really not that much to ask, I just want one person, ONE. Just one person to notice me, to care about me, to hold me, to love me. Just one person, just YOU (whom I might not have met yet, who is destined to be the one and only for me). Does that person even exist? 

 ねぇどうか私を必要としてよ　私を愛してよ

Yes, people cannot live alone. Life is empty without love because the heart is empty. From her vocals and words, I can really feel her pleading for love, the need to be needed, for someone to stop in that busy street and look at her, wipe away her tears, make her feel alive...

私は生きてるよ